Thursday, April 22, 2010

Writers workshop

This is my first writers workshop from mamakat. I needed a distraction this morning, so, here it is. My prompt today? Divorce.

Here's my take: never say never.
I plan on tormenting loving my husband for the rest of my life. Right now, today, that is the plan. That was the plan yesterday and that is most likely going to be the plan tomorrow...but I don't have a crystal ball. I don't know what the future holds for any of us, maybe he'll wake up tomorrow and decide that I am bat shit crazy and he can't deal anymore. Maybe I'll decide I was really meant to be a gypsy or that I want to buy a house on the beach and drink fruity umbrella drinks and have affairs with cute cabana boys. Who knows.
What I do know is that even when he makes me want to scream, I love him. I can't imagine my life without him but I'm not naive. I know people change, things change and if one day he decided I wasn't the woman he wanted to be with, I wouldn't want him to stay out of obligation. I'm not a fan of staying together for the sake of the kids, I think that is just as wrong (if not more so) then whatever it is that happened to make you consider leaving. If you're not in love, if that person doesn't make you happy more then they make you sad, then you shouldn't be with them. Divorce is messy and sad but I don't think it's always a bad thing.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you shouldn't exhaust every other avenue to try and make things work, I'm not at all saying you should just throw in the towel at the first sign of trouble. Not at all. I am saying that if you can't make it work, if you can't make each other happy no matter how hard you try, if you don't love the person you are married to...I totally 110% agree with divorce. Kids need to see parents that are happy and in love, parents that argue but still kiss each other goodnight and say I love you before walking out the door. (2 things that happen every single day around here) Kids need to see all of that...if they see parents that walk around angry with each other, parents who fight and argue more then they laugh and hug...that is what they are going to grow up thinking is okay and normal. Life is too short and at some point you have to give up the fight, admit your part in the problem and make a choice. Fix it or move on.
Now should my darling, wonderful husband ever raise a hand to me in anger...or do anything to hurt our children...well, that would be it. I'd walk away faster then he could apologize and he'd better just pack his bags and start moving because there is no way in hell my dad or brother would let him get away with it. I'm pretty secure in saying I don't have to worry about that though. The man doesn't have an abusive bone in his I think it's safe to say that he'll be with me and my bat shit crazy ways for a very long tim.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Do you say God?

As in "Oh my God" or "God Damnit!"?

At home, sometimes I do. In public, I try not to.
I'm not a religious person, but I was raised going to church until I was 11. 11 years of being reminded not to take the Lord's name in vain is a hard habit to break.
HH is 110% anti-religion. After what he went through as a kid/teen I can't really say I blame him. I totally respect him and what he chooses to believe and not believe.

So we're not in this phase where Thing 1 is testing out what he can and can't get away with saying (he's thrown out "that sucks" once in awhile too). It started with O.M.G. (thank you iCarly)...and then it was "oh my gosh"...and once in awhile he'll throw in an "Oh my God". When he does I remind him that we don't say that, that he says gosh.

HH told me I'm being too strict and that he doesn't think it's a big deal. Honestly, it's not a big deal to me at home...but I know that it's the same as saying shit or damn to some parents and I don't want him to go to a friends house and bust out with "OH MY GOD!" at the dinner table and then feel awkward when the table gets quiet and friends mom has to lean over and tell him they don't say that in their house. Does that make sense? It's more about respect for other people's beliefs then my own.

We've already discussed "bad" words, he knows what he can and can't say. He also knows that there are words that adults say but they're not for kids. Just like there are movies and games for adults that aren't good for kids. He gets it, and he's fine with it. This whole God thing is tripping us up though.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Is there something in the water?

My boys can be crazy and hell on wheels on a good day, but in general they're really not SO bad. Okay, the little one is insane but then he gives you that big ass grin and you can't help but laugh.
For some reason this week...OMG, I've been ready to throttle them both. I swear, it's something in the water.

The tantrums
The crying
The whining

And that's just the OLDEST!!!

We're having pictures taken on Saturday morning and then that night is GIRLS NIGHT OUT...and you bet your sweet ass I'm going to need it!!!

As a side note, and funnier note I was telling Thing 1 today that our friends had their baby. I'd link her blog, but AHEM, she hasn't posted in a year. Anyway, this is the conversation that takes place:

M: Owen and Cole have a new baby brother.
T1: What? They do? Is it a boy?
M: (refraining from the sarcastic come back of "no, their baby BROTHER is a girl*) Yep
T1: Like my baby brother?
M: Well, yes but he's just a little guy
T1: Like a little peanut?
M: Yep
T1: Or a little meat loaf
M: Well, Travis is more the little meat loaf *laughing*

*I never thought I'd be excited at the idea of having a teenager in the house but I am excited for the day that these boys get and understand my sarcasm. Of course with that will come them throwing it right back at me, but I'll reserve the right to bitch about that later :)

Monday, April 12, 2010

Getting to know me

Daisy left me a comment yesterday and when I went to visit she had this cute question/answer blog up. I decided I wanted to play too!

To play..copy the questions..answer them..then come back here and get your link on.

The questions..

1. What color do you wear the most?
Probably black and green, although I'm trying to get away from the black. It's a hard habit to break but I'm trying!

2. Would you rather have $10,000 dollars or a dream vacation?
Give me the cash!!! My dream vacation at the moment is sitting on the beach with an umbrella drink and cute boy to refill that drink and a paid nanny to watch my kids. I'm pretty sure I can do that for less then 10K and still have money left over to do, you know, buy clothes and shoes save.

3. Do you have a weird, quirky or unusual habit?
Making list upon list upon list
Saving junk that I really don't need to save. I have issues although it's nothing like this

Thank you Google Images

4. I really need to start..........?
Cleaning. HH cleaned out the basement yesterday so I suppose today I should do something equally productive. Maybe.

5. What was the first blog you ever read?
Well, her blog is currently having an identity crisis but the first blog I started reading (and the girl that encouraged me to start my own when I was a bit angry with life) was Jen over at Maybe If You Just Relax. I'll link it properly once it's back to it's full glory. And, I'd like to state for the record that I was blog stalking her before she became the super-blogger chick she is now so obviously that just makes me even cooler, right? Or something.

6. Do you collect anything?
Everything and nothing, lol. Just ask HH who spent all weekend sorting my boxes of notes, all catagorized in shoe boxes by grade...from 7th-12th. Sad, I know. Oh, maybe I'll do a blog post on those. (and now I've just made all of my HS friends go "nooooo". Sorry girls, you know I have no shame!)

7. How old were you when you had your first kiss?
My first REAL kiss, I was 13...we were in the woods by the football fields "watching" the game. We watched football games kissed a lot through middle/high school. It was a serious love hate relationship.

8. Do you text/twitter while driving?
I do text but I don't twitter, I have standards ;)

Sunday, April 11, 2010

I'm a queen

Obviously, I'm a queen in my house. What else could I be? I also happen to be a princess, but that's not the point.

Point being...I'm actually an honest to goodness QUEEN FOR THE WEEK!! Yep, that's me! :)
Confessions from a Working Mom

Elizabeth over at Confessions...from a Working Mom does this each week and I think it's awesome!! If you have found me via her blog, welcome. Come on over, get yourself some coffee and make yourself at home! I'll tell you a bit about myself: I'm the redheaded mama, and those boys over to the left? Yea, they're mine. I claim them most days, other days I consider dropping them off at the zoo. What? I don't call the youngest "monkey" for nothing!
I'm a work at home mom, although that seems kind of silly because let's face it...every mom is a work at home mom. That being said, I'm a business manager for a photographer and I work from the desk in my living room. I told you I was a princess, and a bit spoiled.
I over share, I tell stories that shouldn't be posted for the whole internet to read, and I'm fairly certain I'm going to be paying my kids therapy bills in a few years..yet, I do it anyway.
I love coffee, as long as I can't taste the coffee.
Give me a good book and a blue margarita and I'm a happy girl.
I should live on the beach, but I don't.
I am kind of obsessed with lists, and I even make a new list once I cross something off.

My life with 3 boys (unfortunately the fat cat is no longer with us) is not terribly exciting but I like it and hopefully you'll stick around and get to know us and our dysfunctional selves a little better.


Wednesday, April 7, 2010

It's not about him

My darling, fabulous, handsome husband is being incredibly supportive of me while I get a grip on my issues and figure out this whole new and improved me. He's been telling me for years to just tell him what I'm thinking, when I'm thinking it, rather then stewing over it for days/weeks.
Unfortunately for him, this means dealing with my random melt downs/drama queen behavior at times. Like yesterday. Oh, yesterday.

It started with me getting in line at Starbucks only to realize my wallet was on my desk, which is obviously not in my car, and thus I had no money. Lucky for me I realized this before I ordered and was able to get out of line and head home....without be beloved white mocha. *sigh*

I had a bunch of work issues come up that put me way behind on getting out the door to run my child-free errands. Once I finally did get out the door, with my wallet this time, I ran around and managed to accomplish most of what was on my to-do list, which included a stop to look at lingerie.

Time for the rant:
Why don't they make cute/sexy lingerie for REAL women that you can actually buy in the store?! First store had nothing and the second had a whole line of cute matching sets and they were even on sale. Except those cute little thongs, even in the largest size they came in, would still get lost under the spare tire around my middle. And the bras? Really? Ugh. I noticed that they were labeled "juniors" which I found a bit disturbing, a sure sign I'm getting old. All I know is that when I was in HS and shopping in the juniors department, I sure as hell was not wearing stuff like THAT! I can't imagine explaining those to my mother!
Anyway, after leaving that section (and I totally kept typing sex instead of sec right there.) I wandered the entire area and couldn't find anything remotely sexy made to fit someone with, oh I don't know, curves!
I didn't bother with Victoria's secret because I rarely have luck there and am way too cheap anyway. Ambiance has some pretty dirty stuff but I wasn't really going for the naughty nurse or sexy cop look. I just wanted simple & sexy. I've found stuff online but I prefer to buy in store so I can see the quality. I don't care that it only gets worn for 30 seconds before it's in a pile on the floor, if I'm spending the money to buy it I don't want it to feel like sandpaper!

Here's the thing though, I'm not buying this stuff because I think HH wants me to wear it, I wanted to buy it because it makes ME feel sexy. I'm sick of wearing the mom PJ's every night. After I left the store empty handed I sent HH a text and told him what happened and that I was going to start weight watchers again, and maybe when I'm 20lbs lighter I will try again. This turned in to a whole back and forth me being a drama queen text-fest. He said if I lost weight then he'd start working out and tone up so he'd be "ripped". He thought it would be motivation, except I really don't care about muscled or him being ripped. I've never been a body girl, I'm definitely a personality/eyes/smile girl, always have been. I don't want to get skinny for him, I want to do it for me...and I don't want to wear cute lingerie for him, I want to wear it for ME. Of course all of these things also make him happy...and I like making him happy. I like doing things for him that make him happy, but right's about me.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

A post because I feel like it

For the record, I am happy. Happier then I have been in a long time. I'm not saying I'm cured, I'm not saying I wasn't depressed and I'm not saying that there isn't a chance I'll be back in a funk next week. I'm also not saying it has anything to do with the freaking amazing reason I was up until almost 2am last night, only part of which involved little to no clothes and a lot of talking. Nope, not saying that.
I am saying, for now I'm HAPPY. I'm currently sitting outside on the laptop listening to my seven year old play moon sand with his action figures. My dad, my husband, and my baby are inside napping. Yes, all of them. My mom is floating around somewhere because the woman is incapable of just sitting still for 30 seconds. If I had that problem I am sure my house would be much cleaner, but I did not inherit that trait from her. I am perfectly content sitting here doing nothing, drink in hand, on this perfect spring day.

The eldest child has been on Spring Break. I'm not going to lie, a solid week of mommy + 2 boys did not sound promising, especially when it started off with rain. Luckily the rain cleared and we managed to fit in 3 different sleepovers, a trip to the zoo, a park play date, Easter and tomorrow...REST!

Here are a few pics of my absolutely (if I do say so myself) boys from the park and the zoo.
Brotherly love at the zoo. After 12 tries of getting a picture of them together, looking at the camera and smiling, this is as good as I get. Personally, I think it says a lot :)

My Polar Bear 

He was hiding from the goats, he had no interest in feeding them but he did want to eat the crackers himself!

The park. My gosh I love these pictures.


And with that, I leave you with...ROTTEN!