HH commented the other night that I've been rather crabby lately and that I seem to be annoyed by him all the time. I think all the time is a bit extreme, but I am crabby, a lot.
I feel myself slipping, I know it's happening, and yet, I can't stop it.
I WANT to stop it, I don't like snapping at my kids, I don't like looking at my husband and having the urge to throw something at him for no good reason. My kids are amazing little boys and my husband is a wonderful man. Hell, he puts up with me which pretty much makes him a saint in my book.
The thing is, I don't have a lot to be unhappy about. My life is NOT that stressful, it's not that complicated...and yet I find things to get pissy about. I take everything personally, I cry over the littlest thing and I feel that urge to throw things.
Last night I actually ordered my husband to NOT do the dishes. Not even kidding. I was melting because it's a freaking sauna in my house. I told him the baby was in bed and the other one had 10 minutes to finish his show. I was going upstairs to hide in the a/c. He said 'fine, I'll deal with the kitchen'. At that point, normal people would have said 'fine, I cooked dinner, you do that' but oh no, not me. Instead I snapped and told him I would do it because now I feel bad that I was going to go relax. It went on from there until I basically made him promise not to touch the dishes. Seriously people, what is wrong with me?!
Regardless, if I'm quiet, I'm sorry. I just don't have a lot of positive things to say lately. If you know me in real life and I'm acting like a bitch, I'm sorry. I'm usually pretty good at the whole fake it until you make it...but it's getting harder and I'm snapping more then usual.