Saturday, November 27, 2010

Family Dynamics

For whatever reason there is a lot that isn't talked about on my mom's side of the family. I think this is probably where a lot of my "bottle it up until I explode" issues come from. They just aren't big communicators and they like to sweep everything under the rug. Don't talk about it and it doesn't exist!

With my grandma's funeral service last weekend the WHOLE family was together. My aunts, uncle, distant relatives and friends of my mom's that I hadn't seen in ages.

It was interesting, to say the least.

Through this, I started talking with my cousin. We're 10 years part so it's not like we really grew up together. We shared grandparents but well, her story was a bit more complicated then mine. Her parents split up when she was young...and her biological father was my mom's brother...except, well, he's now a woman. Yep. Imagine how well that went over 35 years ago. So, my "uncle" was never spoken about by the time I was born. I didn't even know there was another sibling. I know I had this cousin but with so many cousins and distant family on my dad's side of the family, I never questioned it. I didn't figure it all out until I was a teen. She's now back in our lives, she lives with my aunt and my grandparents (well, my grandpa now). She', well, she's different. Not someone I could deal with on a daily basis, but she's family. So you know, I have to bite my tongue and smile and keep quiet...b/c that is what we do.

My cousin and I had some time to really sit down and talk...and share memories...and while some were very similar, others were very different. Needless to say, she has her own set of we all do...but I think she may win the prize.

Regardless, I'm hoping that we can keep in better touch and talk more. I'm curious about a lot of things and it seems we can fill in a lot of blanks for each other. I have no idea why there are so many secrets, so much that isn't talked about...but man does it help explain so much about my own family and what makes them tick.

Thank goodness for my kids being as crazy as they are, they were a great distraction for everyone last weekend! Talk about a reminder that life goes on.

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