Men are not children

Now stop rolling your eyes and thinking to yourself "who are you kidding, of course they are"

Please, please PLEASE stop acting as if men are infants and need us women to swoop in and save them from themselves. Just STOP.

I have two children that I'm responsible for. I make sure they eat their vegetables, have clean clothes, get enough sleep and are taken care of. I also have a husband. I cook meals, I wash clothes, I clean the house and I ask if he's okay or if he needs anything. I'm generally pretty considerate and thoughtful, it's in my nature. However, I do not baby him. I am NOT his mother, I am his wife. It's not up to me to determine if he's getting enough sleep, if he needs to change out of his work clothes before going to throw a football with the boys, if he's going to be late for work or if he needs a specific shirt clean for the next day.

Guess what? He's a grown up, just like me. I'm perfectly capable of getting up on my own, making sure my own clothes are clean and deciding what I'm going to eat for lunch. I don't need someone to remind me of these things. I can't handle when women act as if their husbands are helpless and can't do things for themselves. It drives me bat shit crazy and we all know I don't need any help in the crazy department. I've always been this way, I remember getting SO mad at my mom because everything seemed to revolve around my dad. Now, don't get me wrong, my parents have a marriage that works for them and I won't judge. Or, I'll try not to anyway, it's just not for ME and I have a hard time understanding why anyone that's been married in the last decade feels like they must baby the poor confused man in their life. He's not confused, he's just going to let you do everything for him because hey, why the hell not?!

So help me if my boys ever get to a point where they forget how to do dishes, wash clothes or pick up after themselves. You'd better believe I will march my ass over to their house and I will not be there to clean up after them. I'll be there to take their wives out for drinks while they figure out how to fend of themselves.

Ladies, please, stop acting as if these men need you to fix everything for them and make all of the decisions for them. They don't. You can be a good wife and a good mother but you need to find that middle ground in between the two.

Who am I?

You learn a lot of random things about yourself when people around you are asked to talk about you.

I've had a few home parties, both for my own Premier Designs business as well as other direct sales friends. I recently hosted a Thirty One Gifts party with the fabulous Charity Plaster and as with my Premier parties she asks everyone in the room to say their name, how they know the hostess (me!) and something they like about her (me!).

Here's a few things I've learned about myself since over the last few parties.

1. I don't mind being the center of attention. This is kind of a big one because at my baby shower and even my wedding shower, I hated it! I hated sitting there and opening gifts in front of everyone and being forced to make small talk with people. While I was grateful to my friends and family that put it together, I was SO happy when it was over. At one point my best friend laughed and made a comment about how I was hating this part of the party...but I wasn't. I really wasn't. I was laughing and enjoying myself...and I didn't turn 4 shades up pink. That's a pretty big deal in my world.

2. I have a unique laugh. I've had two people at two different parties say that I have the best laugh. I do? Really? I had NO idea. That's not something anyone has ever told me before. Ever. Crazy.

3. I am super lucky to have close friends that have known me forever and know the real me, warts and all. I've said that before but I guess sometimes I take for granted the fact that not everyone can say they've known their best friends since middle school. This is also why I think keeping my kids in the same school for as much of their school career as possible is so important to me. While I know it's rare, I'd love if they grew up and raised their families surrounded by the same people they knew in school. My parents did, so maybe it's in my genes.

4. Change is good and I'm not as scared of it as I used to be.

5. I like meeting new people! I like talking to people! I *gasp* like people. Mostly. There are still some that I'd prefer to not talk to and others that could fall off the planet and I'd be okay with that...but for the most part. People are fun.

Anyone out there?!

Helloooooo

Hi

How are ya?

I'm just checking, making sure you're there. I see that people click and hopefully read so I'm guessing somewhere in the internets you're maybe interested in what I have to say. Maybe? Just a little?

Where is the comment love? Come on. Comment, leave me a link to your blog so I can go read.
Leave me a link to your favorites. I need to update my blog roll.

Let's do this!

Going Public

My blog has always just been a place for me to put my random musings, usually about my kids, sometimes about my life. It could probably use a good dose of Zoloft with all of the ups and downs. What can I say? I'm moody.

Every once in awhile I toy with the idea of taking it public and actually linking it to my FB or twitter accounts. Only my "internet friends" would read it for awhile but as those friends become real friends and real friends drift apart...I don't know, it seems silly that I'm hiding it. There's really nothing on here that is offensive and I make no apologies for my thoughts. They're MY thoughts and anyone that knows me, knows that while I might be mad or sad about something, I'll snap out of it. I'll get over and move on b/c I don't have time or space in my life to focus on the negative. Okay, so there are a few posts that my family probably doesn't need to read. Like you know, that one about wrestling. Yea, I don't think anyone in my family needs to read that, maybe I could post a warning label: Sometimes I discuss inappropriate things on my blog, proceed with caution. I'm not sure my dad would ever look at my favorite red shoes the same again if he read this one.

Hmmm, on second thought. Maybe I'll just keep this between me and the anonymous internet world. You know...since the interwebs are private and all.

My Fourth Grader

Somtimes I feel like the 4 year old gets all the blog love. Probably because he's around me all.the.time and I just have more to say about him. That...and he's totally ridiculous.

Not to be left out is the FOURTH GRADER. People, let me just tell you, fourth grade sucks. It just does, as I mentioned before in my rant on homework. We'll survive. Thank goodness there is a liquor store nearby. I kid, I kid.

Fourth grade plus a new neighborhood and new friends? Well, that part is pretty awesome. I've talked about where we lived before, it was pretty ghetto fabulous. It wasn't HORRIBLE, I went for walks, took the kids to the park and felt fairly safe. It was just run down and dirty and depressed...and not getting any better. I couldn't wait to move even though I was a little stressed about all the changes that would mean for everyone.

I can't even begin to explain how awesome it is when your kid comes home from school and the firs thing he wants to do is run outside and play..and ride bikes...and just be a KID. It's awesome. It's something we just didn't have before and something I always wanted for my kids. In general, I think this is one of those things that we just take for granted. As a kid I was always outside running around and playing so the fact that my kids really couldn't do that ate at me.

Tonight he came home in time to eat dinner and do chores. It was 6:15 and he asked if he could go back out and come home by 7:30. I let him go even though he still has things to do. Our hours of daylight are dwindling and I can't help it...it makes me happy to see him so happy. He gave me a hug and ran out the door.

I love that kid.

Fourth Grade Homework

Anyone that has a child old enough to have homework knows that it's not just for the kids, it's for the parents as well. And it sucks for everyone! Aiden spent his early elementary days in a Montessori school. It was a great school that I truly do miss and a major perk (or so I thought...) was no homework. Well, very little homework, he did have spelling that we worked on each night.

The downside to no homework? We didn't really fully grasp what he was struggling in. He always made it seem that he was doing fine and while his teacher would say he needs to work on his math facts it was never made out to be something he was falling behind in, just something he could practice. So when we'd think about it or had time we'd run through some extra math games, we put a game on his DS to practice addition, etc. We went through 1st-3rd grade thinking that he was doing okay.

Now, here we are in a traditional public school with homework each night in math and spelling and he's behind. I feel like this is my fault and when I'm upset with myself I tend to take it out on other people. I try not to show him how frustrated I am because he's frustrated too...but o.m.g. I have a whole new appreciation for why my dad threw his hands up while trying to help me with geometry when I just didn't get it. It's painful to watch!! Every night it's a battle and I am just hoping that sometime soon that light will go on and all those little tricks that we learn while memorizing addition, subtraction, multiplication and division will just click.

Until then, send advil and wine. It's going to be a bumpy ride.

Looking for the money tree

thank you google images!

As I mentioned before, we moved. The house we moved in to is considerably smaller and was built after 1930 so bonus. Although, I adore old houses. I'm so NOT a new construction person...but that's not my point. My point is that in the end this move was supposed to save us money...and I'm sure it will...at some point.

Right now, we're just struggling. I really truly can not complain, the house was a gift and it's amazing and I'm so so thankful but that doesn't make paying the bills any easier. They still have to get paid and in reality, we're just swapping paying a high gas bill for putting more gas in our cars because commutes are longer. Back to school shopping, doing things like building shelves in the garage and putting in a new bathroom floor. It's all things that we're happy and THRILLED to do, really, but omg, it's killing us.

We're not big spenders. I love to shop but I'm much more of a Target clearance girl then a Coach girl. We occasionally splurge on a night out but it's pretty rare. I love a cup of Starbucks but I try to keep it in check. I haven't even been to my all time favorite cupcake place (Main Street Cupcakes. You should go. mmm, cupcakes) because it's not in the budget.

Must.Stick.To.Budget.

It's just a rough week and I'm trying to find ways to make it better. Who out there in cyber world wants to host a Premier party? Anyone?? :) Catalog or in home, I'll travel! LOL No, seriously. Anyone? It's a kick ass good time with some fabulous jewelry. And me, I'm kind of a big deal you know. Just ask my 4 year old ;)

How about pictures? I work with an fabulous photographer. Mini sessions at the end of the month! Find us on Facebook ;) Love Knots Photography

How do you cut corners when you feel like you've already cut the paper in half?? Help me out. I coupon, I shop clearance and I love a good second hand store. I wait for sales. A friend of mine recently did a no spend month, has anyone tried this? I may need to look in to it for November, before the holidays hit. Today is budget day!

Waiting for the notes

I'm waiting for the notes to come home from school.

"Please talk to Ian about his use of potty words in the classroom. We do not find his chicken butt jokes funny." Who doesn't find chicken butts hilarious? He says the other kids laugh.

"We would appreciate it if Ian would stop asking everyone if they are eating a dead animal. It's rather distracting at the lunch table" Well, it *is* a turkey sandwich...

"Ian again asked Sally if she wanted him to shake his booty, she does not. Please talk to him about not shaking his booty at school. We appreciate his love of music but maybe some more 4 year old appropriate songs would be good?" Hey, he likes to dance.

"While we understand the Ian does not finish the sentence his use of 'What The' is not appropriate." hmmm, I got nothing.

I had to edit this to add the conversation from this morning:

M: Ian, you're going to use nice words at school today, right? No potty words?
I: Yep
M: And your manners? Please, May I, thank you...
I: Yep. And no D words.
M: No, no D words. We don't talk like that. We use nice words
I: Ok, no oh my dammit. I won't say dammit at school. And no oh my god.
M: Right, because we don't talk like that.

**we totally talk like that, I'm such a liar. dammit**

First Day of (Pre) School

My baby started preschool yesterday. Some people are all "OMG, it's mah bay-bee!!" and I'm all "OMG I GET TWO WHOLE DAYS TO MY SELF, SEE YA BYE"

This is how I celebrated:

 And then I took a nap. Okay, so I ran some errands but then for real, I took a long ass nap to recover from being sick all weekend and getting no sleep the night before due to cold meds that hate me. That nap was almost as amazing as that pumpkin spice latte!

I've never had any guilt over leaving my kids. I NEED a break, we all need a break. If you leave your child attached to you 24/7 and never let them stay with grandma to be spoiled rotten or hang out with your friends who will equally spoil them rotten...they're missing out. Seriously! Some of my favorite childhood memories aren't with my parents at all. They're spending weekends with my grandparents or having sleepovers with my friends. Even the crazy baby sitters that we had make for great stories. Like the evil wench that tried to make us go to bed before midnight on NYE. Um, who are you kidding?! We totally hid in my parents room while she talked on the phone and watched the ball drop.

Point is, kids need their parents to back the hell off once in awhile and let them be kids. Let them BREATH!

So here is my handsome guy. He picked out his backpack and his lunch box, I did not buy a special first day of school outfit, he picked his own. I did not make any pinterest projects or countdowns. This is how we roll, we keep it simple.

Before School! 

 After I picked him up and got the.biggest.hug.